I'm in the 'loneliness, solitude and negative experience' place and working on a positive attitude every day to keep me strong. You posted your comment a year ago- have you moved on?
P.S. I Love You
Did you find what you were looking for? I appreciate your comment. I'm sorry to hear that you're experiencing the same pain that I am. I gave up on humanity. I stopped trying to connect with people. I'm completely isolated and alone. I'd honestly rather be alone than settle for someone I can't develop a meaningful connection with. I work full time during the week but I have free time on nights and weekends.
Although I love living alone because I come home to a clean, quiet, peaceful apartment.. It can be painful at times. I'm a very loving, affectionate woman. Not having someone to share affection with leaves me feeling empty and numb. I'm completely independent and self sufficient but I'm starting to feel dead inside because of my self imposed isolation. I could get back out into the singles scene and just have casual relations but that doesn't appeal to me. Sharing myself with someone who's only interested in my body makes me feel like a used piece of meat.
People these days don't want to put in the time or effort to make a lasting connection. Short attention spans are the norm because people always want instant gratification. I don't have the patience to continue having negative experiences every time I try to connect with someone. I accept that loneliness is going to be a permanent part of my life.
Well with the kind of women out there these days finding Real Love is very Difficult now for many of us Good men since Most women today being so very Picky and will only want the Best of all and will Never settle for Less. Years ago it was so very Easy finding real love which today it is like trying to win the Lottery. Today unfortunately it is a very extremely difficult time finding real love now since the times today have really changed and so have the women that are making it very difficult for many of us good men that are still looking.
I can certainly blame the women of today since they're nothing at all like the good old fashioned women that we had in the past that really did make it very easy back then. When you compare the women of today to the women in the past it is like night and day unfortunately. The women today for example which most of them that have a career now are making a six figure income which they never even heard of back then which certainly explains it all. And the women of today that are making a very good salary now are very high maintenance, independent, selfish, spoiled, greedy, picky, and so very money hungry as well.
They will only want the best of all and will never settle for less since it is now about them unfortunately which they will never go with a man that makes much less money than they do which there lies the problem for us good men that don't make that kind of a income even though we do alright for ourselves to get by. Today many women don't even have a good personality, no respect for many of us men, and no good manors at all either. They will mouth off to many of us good men when we will try to start a conversation with them since i had this happened to me already which a friend that i know had it happened to him as well about a couple of months after me which doesn't make any sense at all how women can be very nasty these days.
All i said to this woman that i really wanted to meet was good morning how are you which she mouthed off to me and told me don't bother me and go away or i will call the police on you. She probably had some kind of a very severe mental problem that i never knew to begin with which that would certainly explain it as well. So today it has certainly become very dangerous for many of us men really looking for real love as you can see when it was certainly much easier in the past since most of the women at that time were really very different than today since the women back then really did put these women today to real shame altogether.
It is very obvious why many of us men are still single today since we can never blame ourselves at all since it does take two to tango. Many people cross our paths till we reach our destination where we meet the perfect one for us. If not completely easy, it is still easier easy to find who loves us, but it is really hard to understand who we love. At times, we even confuse our feelings of infatuation as love and that is when situation jeopardizes. So, today, this is what I am going to explain to you. Today most women have a very huge list of demands when it comes to men.
Must have a very full head of hair, be in very excellent shape, be very good looking, having a career making mega bucks, have his own home, and drive a very expensive car as well. So how in the world would many of us single men be able to meet a good woman to begin with? And with most women nowadays that are so very obese and not all that attractive either which enough of the truth has just been said.
I think it is very true what you said.
3 Keys to Finding the Love of Your Life - SYMBIS Assessment
But, I think there's a missing piece in the article. A long term relationship has to be based on mutual strong foundations. Can't leave a link, so look for 'Pairing - Empowering Relationships' on Google. Gregory L. Jantz, Ph. Addiction wants to leave loved ones in the dark as long as possible. Back Psychology Today. Back Find a Therapist. Back Get Help. Back Magazine. Subscribe Issue Archive.
Where Love is and How to Get It
Back Today. How We Affect Each Other. Jantz Ph. Get to know yourself first. The Submitted by Anonymous on June 8, - pm. It's like a zen koan. The best way to find real love is to not need or seek it. Great Advice Submitted by Sabrina on June 9, - am. Two paths Submitted by George on June 16, - pm. Thank You Submitted by anonymous on June 17, - am.
1) You ask too much of people
I really appreciate this response. Submitted by Rebecca on July 11, - pm. Thank you. Re: great advice Submitted by Nigel on July 17, - am. Hi Nigel Submitted by Sabrina on August 5, - pm. That link is from me Submitted by Debbie on June 16, - pm. Again, this is a form of self-sabotage and you could be committing it more than you know.
We hang on to our stories pretty hard and they soon become our identities. According to Firestone:. We should take action and make an effort to get out into the world, smile, make eye contact and let friends know we are looking for someone. Firestone explains :. With time and painful experiences, we all risk building up varying degrees of bitterness and become defended.
In our adult relationships, we may resist being too vulnerable or write people off too easily. See the good in them, ignore the bad.
Or you get angry over something else later. Psychospiritual writer Aletheia Luna says :. Instead, talk about your concerns or issues. I know it sounds lame, but honesty is the only way to build trust in a relationship. The truth is, it takes a lot more than love to build a healthy, long-lasting relationship. A successful relationship is about trust, commitment, attachment, attraction, communication and a whole lot more.
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Because at the end of the day, love is a choice. Clinical director and licensed counselor Dr. Kurt Smith explains :. Staying in love takes a commitment. After the rosy glow of the new relationship wears off, we have to make a decision: Do we want to love this person and commit to a relationship together, or are we going to let this person go?
A big part of that work is making many other choices.
According to clinician Maria Baratta:. Loving again after bitter breakups, difficult divorces, abusive partnerships, and financial disasters does happen. There are so many different ways to meet people these days, with apps like Tinder and Bumble, so use them to your advantage! Go ahead and meet new people. Go on dates to get to know other people. Life coach and author, Sarah E.
Stewart tells Bustle:. Sick and tired of messy relationships? Join us for this masterclass, playing only for a limited time. It is important to be positive even if you are on your one-hundredth bad date.
And think of it this way: You might not go on a date with someone who is perfect for you, but you might make some friends who know someone who is. A common theme among people who are single is that they think they are terrible at attracting other people. According to marriage and family psychologist Kathryn Smerling:. Be yourself, be nice, and have a normal conversation.
You might find that people will like you for who you are. But the truth is, love is only one factor in your life. In a nutshell, you are just too needy. Whether you need your partner to call you four times a day or you need to know what they are doing every minute of the day, your expectations do not match your reality of relationships. According to psychologist and relationship expert Dr.
Craig Malkin:. Think about that and then go out and look for someone to compliment your lifestyle, not complete it. Your standards are just too high. Plain and simple. Get off your high horse and start looking for partners who are on the ground. Firestone says :. If you expect your partner to be Mr. Right, you better get yourself together first. Get yourself together and you might have an easier time finding love. Author and life coach John Kim advises :. Until you die.
If you always pick someone up in a bar, trying hanging out in a different place next Friday night. And baby, it sounds like you might be the problem. If you fall into this category, the solution is to stop talking and start listening.
Rather than trying to be the star of the show, let your date be the star of the show. Ask them questions, and refrain from making comments. If you put your foot in your mouth more than on the dancefloor, sit tight. Let your listening skills represent you until you are more comfortable around your current love interest. Remember that you are worthy of love, but that you can focus on loving yourself in the meantime. Trying to find love to make your life complete is like trying to find a needle in a haystack.
Another human being cannot complete your life, despite what you might have seen in every romantic comedy movie ever made. According to psychiatrist Dr. Abigail Brenner:. You may be able to make better choices and decisions about who you are and what you want without outside influence. Fix yourself, and love will find you.